tanto tempo que eu poderia gastar de outra forma. sendo feliz. olhando pra frente, investindo em mim. mas eu só tinha coragem pra ficar no meu casulo, esperando pelo dia em que você me notasse lá e me ajudasse a sair. não aconteceu, ainda bem, o que seria a vida se nosso sonhos fossem realizados aos dezessete anos? ter tudo o que sonhamos tão cedo assim não pode ser saudável. e, ah, agora não dói mais! eu até me sinto na obrigaçao de sofrer mas não sofro! sofro por um breve momento até que percebo que não estou sofrendo, que tenho motivos pra sorrir, que você não daria mais sentido à minha vida e que, principalmente, se não notou até agora o que há entre nós não merece viver isso. ainda não. não comigo... te amei.

foi lindo. acabou. ao menos pra você. e hoje em dia talvez não fosse tão lindo assim. ou talvez fosse ainda melhor. mas não será, simplesmente. sem nenhuma caracterização: não será. e há tanto tempo tento enfiar isso nessa cabeça teimosa... nesse meu coração ingênuo de você...
não me faz bem. te ver não me faz bem. não no seu ambiente, com os seus amigos, tão auto-suficiente, sem mim. não me faz bem ver o que te faz feliz e que isso não tem mais nada a ver comigo... dói mais do que qualquer outra coisa. parece até que faz menos tempo que eu vivo assim; parece que eu sempre estive dessa maneira. é um sonho distante o tempo que passamos juntos, distante e infantil, inocente, precoce.
a beleza é mesmo efêmera. a sua bem que poderia passar. ou a em que te criei.

I lean against the wind, pretend that I am weightless
and in this moment I am happy
but I wish you were here

we used to be just like twins, so in sync
the same energy now's a dead battery
used to laugh 'bout nothing
now you're plain boring
I should know
that you're not gonna change

that face of an angel
comes out just when you need it to
as I paced back and forth all this time
cause I honestly believed in you
holding on the days drag on
I should’ve known
I’m not the one you’ll sweep off her feet
lead her up the stairwell
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
maybe I was naive, got lost in your eyes
and never really had a chance
my mistake, I didn’t know to be in love
you had to fight to have the upper hand
I had so many dreams about you and me
happy endings, well now I know

I’m gonna find someone someday
who might actually treat me well
this is a big world, that was a small town
there in my rearview mirror disappearing now...

You know you can't give me what I need
And even though you mean so much to me
I can't wait through everything
Is this really happening?
I could swear I'd never be happy again
And don't you dare say we can just be friends
I'm not some boy that you can sway
We knew it'd happen eventually

isso nem me faz mais muito mal
mas tem coisas que eu gosto de lembrar.

The sunset is still there. And all the stars. The flowers are there and so are their petals which used to cover the ground with your soul and to make one turn into the other. They still fall at certain times. The rain still purifies me and brings me back to life. I still don’t know what I want but I’ve found out somethings I don’t. and I don’t actually avoid those very often. I don’t miss any memories. After all, all I still have of my own are memories. My dreams remain all here, and so are the possibilities of making them come true. My nightmares usually include you, even when they give me a short time of you and me. The problem is I wake up. I still can smile and I laugh even more. I still can go running to forget my problems. I already have other problems, although some are the very same ones. The colours I saw then, I still see them, and the sky has always a new sparkle or an old one to remind me of what it used to be. The beautiful songs and their as beautiful introductions still please my ears and I’ve surprisingly met some you’ve never heard. I even have my own melodies. The moon shows up almost every night and brightens my clouds when darkness is all I see. The sun rises every single morning, even when the moon forgets me by myself. It doesn’t shine for only you. My body is still the same without you, my thoughts are even better. My emotions and feelings are now more easily controlled, but I’ve realized that intensity is a part of me. Your body is not here, and you may not take me with you, but you’ll always be with me, even when someone else is by my side showing new beautiful things. Maybe nothing needs you to be there, maybe neither do I, but it would feel nice.